All THESE SONG LYRICS ARE WRITTEN BY ME LISTNING TO RADIO....
I DIDNT COPY ANY OF THIS FROM ANY SITE..
THANK YOU,
GAMINI RT
Friday, May 6, 2011
"Drug Ballad"
[Girl] Yeah, hahahaha...whooooo, shit!
[Em] (aight)
[Eminem] Guess what? I ain't coming in yet...
I'll come in a minute
[Eminem] Ayo...This is my love song...it goes like this
[Eminem]
Back when Mark Walhberg was Marky Mark
This is how we used to make the party start
We used to mix Hen' with Bacardi Dark
And when it, kicks in you can hardly talk
And by the, sixth gin you're gonna probably crawl
And you'll be, sick then and you'll probably barf
And my pre-diction is you're gonna probably fall
Either somewhere in the lobby or the hallway wall
And everything's spinning
You're beginin' to think women
are swimming in pink linen again in the sink
Then in a couple of minutes that bottle of Guinness is finished
You are now allowed to officially slap bitches
You have the right to remain violent and start wilin'
Start a fight with the same guy that was smart eyin' you
Get in your car, start it, and start drivin'
Over the island and cause a 42 car pile-up
[Em's spaceman voice]Earth calling, pilot to co-pilot
Looking at the life on this planet, sir, no sign of it
All I can see is a bunch of smoke flyin'
And I'm so high that I might die if I go by it
Let me out of this place
I'm outta place
I'm in outer space
I've just vanished without a trace
I'm going to a pretty place now where the flowers grow
I'll be back in an hour or so
[Chorus]
[Eminem]
'Cause every time I go to try to leave
Someone keeps pullin' on my sleeve
I don't wanna, but I gotta stay
These drugs really got a hold of me
'Cause every time I try to tell them "no"
They won't let me ever let them go
I'm a sucker all I gotta say
These drugs really got a hold of me
[Eminem]
In third grade, all I used to do
Was sniff glue through a tube and play Rubic's cube
17 years later I'm as Rude as Jude
Scheming on the first chick with the hugest boobs
I've got no game
And every face looks the same
They've got no name
So I don't need game to play
I just say whatever I want to whoever I want
Whenever I want, wherever I want, however I want
However, I do show some respect to few
As ecstasy got me standing next to you
Getting sentimental as fuck spillin' guts to you
We just met
But I think I'm in love with you
But you're on it too
So you tell me you love me too
Wake up in the morning like "yo, what the fuck we do?"
I gotta go bitch
You know I have stuff to do
'Cause if I get caught cheatin' then I'm stuck with you
But in the long run
These drugs are probably going to catch up sooner or later
But fuck it, I'm on one
So let's enjoy
Let the X destroy your spinal cord
So it's not a straight line no more
'Til we walk around looking like some wind-up dolls
Shit's sticking out of our backs like a dinosaur
Shit, six hits won't even get me high no more
So bye for now
I'm going to try to find some more
[Chorus]
[Eminem]
That's the sound of a bottle when it's hollow
When you swallow it all wallow and drown in your sorrow
And tomorrow you're probably going to want to do it again
What's a little spinal fluid between you and a friend? Screw it
And what's a little bit of alcohol poisoning?
And what's a little fight?
Tomorrow you'll be boys again
It's your life
Live it however you wanna
Marijuana is everywhere
Where was you brought up?
It don't matter as long as you get where you're going
'Cause none of the shit is going to mean shit where we're going
They tell you to stop, but you just sit there ignoring
Even though you wake up feeling like shit every morning
But you're young
You've got a lot of drugs to do
Girls to screw
Parties to crash
Sucks to be you
If I could take it all back now, I wouldn't
I would have did more shit that people said that I shouldn't
But I'm all grown up now and upgraded and graduated
Did better drugs and updated
But I've still got a lot of growing up to do
I've still got a whole lot of throwing up to spew
But when it's all said and done I'll be 40
Before I know it with a 40 on the porch telling stories
With a bottle of Jack
Two grandkids in my lap
Babysitting for Hailie while Hailie's out getting smashed
[Chorus 2x]
[Same as previous, but 2nd time the last line is repeated like this]
Drugs really got a hold of me
They really got a hold of me
'Cause drugs really got a hold of me
They really got a hold of me
[Girl] Yeah, hahahaha...whooooo, shit!
[Em] (aight)
[Eminem] Guess what? I ain't coming in yet...
I'll come in a minute
[Eminem] Ayo...This is my love song...it goes like this
[Eminem]
Back when Mark Walhberg was Marky Mark
This is how we used to make the party start
We used to mix Hen' with Bacardi Dark
And when it, kicks in you can hardly talk
And by the, sixth gin you're gonna probably crawl
And you'll be, sick then and you'll probably barf
And my pre-diction is you're gonna probably fall
Either somewhere in the lobby or the hallway wall
And everything's spinning
You're beginin' to think women
are swimming in pink linen again in the sink
Then in a couple of minutes that bottle of Guinness is finished
You are now allowed to officially slap bitches
You have the right to remain violent and start wilin'
Start a fight with the same guy that was smart eyin' you
Get in your car, start it, and start drivin'
Over the island and cause a 42 car pile-up
[Em's spaceman voice]Earth calling, pilot to co-pilot
Looking at the life on this planet, sir, no sign of it
All I can see is a bunch of smoke flyin'
And I'm so high that I might die if I go by it
Let me out of this place
I'm outta place
I'm in outer space
I've just vanished without a trace
I'm going to a pretty place now where the flowers grow
I'll be back in an hour or so
[Chorus]
[Eminem]
'Cause every time I go to try to leave
Someone keeps pullin' on my sleeve
I don't wanna, but I gotta stay
These drugs really got a hold of me
'Cause every time I try to tell them "no"
They won't let me ever let them go
I'm a sucker all I gotta say
These drugs really got a hold of me
[Eminem]
In third grade, all I used to do
Was sniff glue through a tube and play Rubic's cube
17 years later I'm as Rude as Jude
Scheming on the first chick with the hugest boobs
I've got no game
And every face looks the same
They've got no name
So I don't need game to play
I just say whatever I want to whoever I want
Whenever I want, wherever I want, however I want
However, I do show some respect to few
As ecstasy got me standing next to you
Getting sentimental as fuck spillin' guts to you
We just met
But I think I'm in love with you
But you're on it too
So you tell me you love me too
Wake up in the morning like "yo, what the fuck we do?"
I gotta go bitch
You know I have stuff to do
'Cause if I get caught cheatin' then I'm stuck with you
But in the long run
These drugs are probably going to catch up sooner or later
But fuck it, I'm on one
So let's enjoy
Let the X destroy your spinal cord
So it's not a straight line no more
'Til we walk around looking like some wind-up dolls
Shit's sticking out of our backs like a dinosaur
Shit, six hits won't even get me high no more
So bye for now
I'm going to try to find some more
[Chorus]
[Eminem]
That's the sound of a bottle when it's hollow
When you swallow it all wallow and drown in your sorrow
And tomorrow you're probably going to want to do it again
What's a little spinal fluid between you and a friend? Screw it
And what's a little bit of alcohol poisoning?
And what's a little fight?
Tomorrow you'll be boys again
It's your life
Live it however you wanna
Marijuana is everywhere
Where was you brought up?
It don't matter as long as you get where you're going
'Cause none of the shit is going to mean shit where we're going
They tell you to stop, but you just sit there ignoring
Even though you wake up feeling like shit every morning
But you're young
You've got a lot of drugs to do
Girls to screw
Parties to crash
Sucks to be you
If I could take it all back now, I wouldn't
I would have did more shit that people said that I shouldn't
But I'm all grown up now and upgraded and graduated
Did better drugs and updated
But I've still got a lot of growing up to do
I've still got a whole lot of throwing up to spew
But when it's all said and done I'll be 40
Before I know it with a 40 on the porch telling stories
With a bottle of Jack
Two grandkids in my lap
Babysitting for Hailie while Hailie's out getting smashed
[Chorus 2x]
[Same as previous, but 2nd time the last line is repeated like this]
Drugs really got a hold of me
They really got a hold of me
'Cause drugs really got a hold of me
They really got a hold of me
"Marshall Mathers"
[Eminem]
You know I just don't get it
Last year I was nobody
This year I'm sellin records
Now everybody wants to come around like I owe em somethin
Heh, the fuck you want from me, ten million dollars?
Get the fuck out of here
[Chorus One: Eminem]
You see I'm, just Marshall Mathers (Marshall Mathers)
I'm just a regular guy,
I don't know why all the fuss about me (fuss about me)
Nobody ever gave a fuck before,
all they did was doubt me (did was doubt me)
Now everybody wanna run they mouth
and try to take shots at me (take shots at me)
[Eminem]
Yo, you might see me joggin, you might see me walkin
You might see me walkin a dead rottweiler dog
with it's head chopped off in the park with a spiked collar
hollerin at him cause the son of a bitch won't quit barkin
(grrrr, ARF ARF) Or leanin out a window, with a cocked shotgun
Drivin up the block in the car that they shot 'Pac in
Lookin for Big's killers, dressed in ridiculous
blue and red like I don't see what the big deal is
Double barrel twelve gauge bigger than Chris Wallace
Pissed off, cause Biggie and 'Pac just missed all this
Watchin all these cheap imitations get rich off 'em
and get dollars that shoulda been there's like they switched wallets
And amidst all this Crist' poppin and wristwatches
I just sit back and just watch and just get nauseous
and walk around with an empty bottle of Remi Martin
startin shit like some 26-year-old skinny Cartman ("God damnit!")
I'm anti-Backstreet and Ricky Martin
with instincts to kill N'Sync, don't get me started
These fuckin brats can't sing and Britney's garbage
What's this bitch retarded? Gimme back my sixteen dollars
All I see is sissies in magazines smiling
Whatever happened to whylin out and bein violent?
Whatever happened to catchin a good-ol' fashioned
passionate ass-whoopin and gettin your shoes coat and your hat tooken?
New Kids on the Block, sucked a lot of dick
Boy/girl groups make me sick
And I can't wait 'til I catch all you faggots in public
I'ma love it.. (hahaha)
Vanilla Ice don't like me (uh-uh)
Said some shit in Vibe to spite me (yup)
Then went and dyed his hair just like me (hehe)
A bunch of little kids wanna swear just like me
and run around screamin, "I don't care, just bite me" (nah nah)
I think I was put here to annoy the world
and destroy your little 4-year-old boy or girl
Plus I was put here to put fear in faggots who spray Faygo Root Beer
and call themselves "Clowns" cause they look queer
Faggot2Dope and Silent Gay
Claimin Detroit, when y'all live twenty miles away (fuckin punks)
And I don't wrestle, I'll knock you fuckin faggots the fuck out
Ask 'em about the club they was at when they snuck out
after they ducked out the back when they saw us and bugged out
(AHHH!) Ducked down and got paintballs shot at they truck, blaow!
Look at y'all runnin your mouth again
when you ain't seen a fuckin Mile Road, South of 10
And I don't need help, from D-12, to beat up two females
in make-up, who may try to scratch me with Lee Nails
"Slim Anus," you damn right, Slim Anus
I don't get fucked in mine like you two little flaming faggots!
[Chorus Two: Eminem]
Cause I'm, just Marshall Mathers (Marshall Mathers)
I'm not a wrestler guy,
I'll knock you out if you talk about me (you talk about me)
Come and see me on the streets alone
if you assholes doubt me (assholes doubt me)
And if you wanna run your mouth
then come take your best shot at me (your best shot at me)
[Eminem]
Is it because you love me that y'all expect so much of me?
You little groupie bitch, get off me, go fuck Puffy
Now because of this blonde mop that's on top
and this fucked up head that I've got, I've gone pop?
The underground just spunned around and did a 360
Now these kids diss me and act like some big sissies
"Oh, he just did some shit with Missy,
so now he thinks he's too big to do some shit with MC Get-Bizzy"
My fuckin bitch mom's suin for ten million
She must want a dollar for every pill I've been stealin
Shit, where the fuck you think I picked up the habit?
All I had to do was go in her room and lift up her mattress
Which is it bitch, Mrs. Briggs or Ms. Mathers?
It doesn't matter your [attorney Fred Gibson's a] faggot!
Talkin about I fabricated my past
He's just aggravated I won't ejaculate in his ass (Uhh!)
So tell me, what the hell is a fella to do?
For every million I make, another relative sues
Family fightin and fussin over who wants to invite me to supper
All the sudden, I got 90 some cousins (Hey it's me!)
A half-brother and sister who never seen me
or even bothered to call me until they saw me on TV
Now everybody's so happy and proud
I'm finally allowed to step foot in my girlfriend's house
Hey-hey! And then to top it off, I walked to the newsstand
to buy this cheap-ass little magazine with a food stamp
Skipped to the last page, flipped right fast
and what do I see? A picture of my big white ass
Okay, let me give you motherfuckers some help:
uhh, here - DOUBLE XL, DOUBLE XL
Now your magazine shouldn't have so much trouble to sell
Ahh fuck it, I'll even buy a couple myself
[Chorus One (2X)]
[Eminem]
You know I just don't get it
Last year I was nobody
This year I'm sellin records
Now everybody wants to come around like I owe em somethin
Heh, the fuck you want from me, ten million dollars?
Get the fuck out of here
[Chorus One: Eminem]
You see I'm, just Marshall Mathers (Marshall Mathers)
I'm just a regular guy,
I don't know why all the fuss about me (fuss about me)
Nobody ever gave a fuck before,
all they did was doubt me (did was doubt me)
Now everybody wanna run they mouth
and try to take shots at me (take shots at me)
[Eminem]
Yo, you might see me joggin, you might see me walkin
You might see me walkin a dead rottweiler dog
with it's head chopped off in the park with a spiked collar
hollerin at him cause the son of a bitch won't quit barkin
(grrrr, ARF ARF) Or leanin out a window, with a cocked shotgun
Drivin up the block in the car that they shot 'Pac in
Lookin for Big's killers, dressed in ridiculous
blue and red like I don't see what the big deal is
Double barrel twelve gauge bigger than Chris Wallace
Pissed off, cause Biggie and 'Pac just missed all this
Watchin all these cheap imitations get rich off 'em
and get dollars that shoulda been there's like they switched wallets
And amidst all this Crist' poppin and wristwatches
I just sit back and just watch and just get nauseous
and walk around with an empty bottle of Remi Martin
startin shit like some 26-year-old skinny Cartman ("God damnit!")
I'm anti-Backstreet and Ricky Martin
with instincts to kill N'Sync, don't get me started
These fuckin brats can't sing and Britney's garbage
What's this bitch retarded? Gimme back my sixteen dollars
All I see is sissies in magazines smiling
Whatever happened to whylin out and bein violent?
Whatever happened to catchin a good-ol' fashioned
passionate ass-whoopin and gettin your shoes coat and your hat tooken?
New Kids on the Block, sucked a lot of dick
Boy/girl groups make me sick
And I can't wait 'til I catch all you faggots in public
I'ma love it.. (hahaha)
Vanilla Ice don't like me (uh-uh)
Said some shit in Vibe to spite me (yup)
Then went and dyed his hair just like me (hehe)
A bunch of little kids wanna swear just like me
and run around screamin, "I don't care, just bite me" (nah nah)
I think I was put here to annoy the world
and destroy your little 4-year-old boy or girl
Plus I was put here to put fear in faggots who spray Faygo Root Beer
and call themselves "Clowns" cause they look queer
Faggot2Dope and Silent Gay
Claimin Detroit, when y'all live twenty miles away (fuckin punks)
And I don't wrestle, I'll knock you fuckin faggots the fuck out
Ask 'em about the club they was at when they snuck out
after they ducked out the back when they saw us and bugged out
(AHHH!) Ducked down and got paintballs shot at they truck, blaow!
Look at y'all runnin your mouth again
when you ain't seen a fuckin Mile Road, South of 10
And I don't need help, from D-12, to beat up two females
in make-up, who may try to scratch me with Lee Nails
"Slim Anus," you damn right, Slim Anus
I don't get fucked in mine like you two little flaming faggots!
[Chorus Two: Eminem]
Cause I'm, just Marshall Mathers (Marshall Mathers)
I'm not a wrestler guy,
I'll knock you out if you talk about me (you talk about me)
Come and see me on the streets alone
if you assholes doubt me (assholes doubt me)
And if you wanna run your mouth
then come take your best shot at me (your best shot at me)
[Eminem]
Is it because you love me that y'all expect so much of me?
You little groupie bitch, get off me, go fuck Puffy
Now because of this blonde mop that's on top
and this fucked up head that I've got, I've gone pop?
The underground just spunned around and did a 360
Now these kids diss me and act like some big sissies
"Oh, he just did some shit with Missy,
so now he thinks he's too big to do some shit with MC Get-Bizzy"
My fuckin bitch mom's suin for ten million
She must want a dollar for every pill I've been stealin
Shit, where the fuck you think I picked up the habit?
All I had to do was go in her room and lift up her mattress
Which is it bitch, Mrs. Briggs or Ms. Mathers?
It doesn't matter your [attorney Fred Gibson's a] faggot!
Talkin about I fabricated my past
He's just aggravated I won't ejaculate in his ass (Uhh!)
So tell me, what the hell is a fella to do?
For every million I make, another relative sues
Family fightin and fussin over who wants to invite me to supper
All the sudden, I got 90 some cousins (Hey it's me!)
A half-brother and sister who never seen me
or even bothered to call me until they saw me on TV
Now everybody's so happy and proud
I'm finally allowed to step foot in my girlfriend's house
Hey-hey! And then to top it off, I walked to the newsstand
to buy this cheap-ass little magazine with a food stamp
Skipped to the last page, flipped right fast
and what do I see? A picture of my big white ass
Okay, let me give you motherfuckers some help:
uhh, here - DOUBLE XL, DOUBLE XL
Now your magazine shouldn't have so much trouble to sell
Ahh fuck it, I'll even buy a couple myself
[Chorus One (2X)]
"I'm Back"
[Chorus: Eminem repeat 4X]
That's why they call me Slim Shady (I'm Back)
I'm Back (I'm Back) (SLIM SHADY!) I'm Back
[Eminem]
I murder a rhyme one word at a time
You never, heard of a mind as perverted as mine
You better, get rid of that nine, it ain't gonna help
What good's it gonna do against a man that strangles himself?
I'm waitin for hell like hell shit I'm anxious as hell
Manson, you're safe in that cell, be thankful it's jail
I used to be my mommy's little angel at twelve
Thirteen I was puttin shells in a gauge on a shelf
I used to, get punked and bullied on my block
'til I cut a kitten's head off and stuck it in this kid's mailbox
("Mom! MOM!") I used to give a - fuck, now I could give a fuck less
What do I think of suc-cess? It sucks, too much press I'm stressed
Too much stares two breasts, too upset
It's just too much mess, I guess I must just blew up quick (yes)
Grew up quick (no) was raised right
Whatever you say is wrong, whatever I say is right
You think of my name now whenever you say, "Hi"
Became a commodity because I'm W-H-I-
-T-E, cuz MTV was so friendly to me
Can't wait 'til Kim sees me
Now is it worth it? Look at my life, how is it perfect?
Read my lips bitch, what, my mouth isn't workin?
You hear this finger? Oh it's upside down
Here, let me turn this motherfucker up right now
[Chorus]
[Eminem]
I take each individual degenerate's head and reach into it
just to see if he's influenced by me if he listens to music
And if he feeds into this shit he's an innocent victim
and becomes a puppet on the string of my tennis shoe
[vocal scratches] My name is Slim Shady
I been crazy way before radio didn't play me
The sensational [vocal scratch "Back is the incredible!"]
With Ken Kaniff, who just finds the men edible
It's Ken Kaniff on the, internet
Tryin to, lure your kids with him, into bed
It's a, sick world we live in these days
"Slim for Pete's sakes put down Christopher Reeve's legs!"
Geez, you guys are so sensitive
"Slim it's a touchy subject, try and just don't mention it"
Mind with no sense in it, fried to get so frenetic
whose eyes get so squinted, I'm blind from smokin 'em
with my windows tinted, with nine limos rented
Doin lines of coke in 'em, with a bunch of guys hoppin out
all high and indo scented (inhales, exhales)
And that's where I get my name from, that's why they call me
[Chorus]
[Eminem]
I take seven (kids) from (Columbine), stand 'em all in line
Add an AK-47, a revolver, a nine
a Mack-11 and it oughta solve the problem of mine
and that's a whole school of bullies shot up all at one time
Cause (I'mmmm) Shady, they call me as crazy
as the world was over this whole Y2K thing
And by the way, N'Sync, why do they sing?
Am I the only one who realizes they stink?
Should I dye my hair pink and care what y'all think?
Lip sync and buy a bigger size of earrings?
It's why I tend to block out when I hear things
Cause all these fans screamin is makin my ears ring (AHHHH!!!)
So I just, throw up a middle finger and let it linger
longer than the rumor that I was stickin it to Christina
Cause if I ever stuck it to any singer in showbiz
it'd be Jennifer Lopez, and Puffy you know this!
I'm sorry Puff, but I don't give a fuck if this chick was my own mother
I still fuck her with no rubber and cum inside her
and have a son and a new brother at the same time
and just say that it ain't mine, what's my name?
[Chorus]
[Eminem {vocal scratching}]
Guess who's b-back, back
Gue-gue-guess who's back (Hi mom!)
[scratch] Guess who's back
[scratch] Gue [scratch] guess who's back
D-12 [scratch] Guess who's back
Gue, gue-gue-gue, guess who's back
Dr. Dre [scratch] Guess who's back
Back back [scratch] back
[scratch]
Slim Shady, 2001
I'm blew out from this blunt (sighs) fuck
[Chorus: Eminem repeat 4X]
That's why they call me Slim Shady (I'm Back)
I'm Back (I'm Back) (SLIM SHADY!) I'm Back
[Eminem]
I murder a rhyme one word at a time
You never, heard of a mind as perverted as mine
You better, get rid of that nine, it ain't gonna help
What good's it gonna do against a man that strangles himself?
I'm waitin for hell like hell shit I'm anxious as hell
Manson, you're safe in that cell, be thankful it's jail
I used to be my mommy's little angel at twelve
Thirteen I was puttin shells in a gauge on a shelf
I used to, get punked and bullied on my block
'til I cut a kitten's head off and stuck it in this kid's mailbox
("Mom! MOM!") I used to give a - fuck, now I could give a fuck less
What do I think of suc-cess? It sucks, too much press I'm stressed
Too much stares two breasts, too upset
It's just too much mess, I guess I must just blew up quick (yes)
Grew up quick (no) was raised right
Whatever you say is wrong, whatever I say is right
You think of my name now whenever you say, "Hi"
Became a commodity because I'm W-H-I-
-T-E, cuz MTV was so friendly to me
Can't wait 'til Kim sees me
Now is it worth it? Look at my life, how is it perfect?
Read my lips bitch, what, my mouth isn't workin?
You hear this finger? Oh it's upside down
Here, let me turn this motherfucker up right now
[Chorus]
[Eminem]
I take each individual degenerate's head and reach into it
just to see if he's influenced by me if he listens to music
And if he feeds into this shit he's an innocent victim
and becomes a puppet on the string of my tennis shoe
[vocal scratches] My name is Slim Shady
I been crazy way before radio didn't play me
The sensational [vocal scratch "Back is the incredible!"]
With Ken Kaniff, who just finds the men edible
It's Ken Kaniff on the, internet
Tryin to, lure your kids with him, into bed
It's a, sick world we live in these days
"Slim for Pete's sakes put down Christopher Reeve's legs!"
Geez, you guys are so sensitive
"Slim it's a touchy subject, try and just don't mention it"
Mind with no sense in it, fried to get so frenetic
whose eyes get so squinted, I'm blind from smokin 'em
with my windows tinted, with nine limos rented
Doin lines of coke in 'em, with a bunch of guys hoppin out
all high and indo scented (inhales, exhales)
And that's where I get my name from, that's why they call me
[Chorus]
[Eminem]
I take seven (kids) from (Columbine), stand 'em all in line
Add an AK-47, a revolver, a nine
a Mack-11 and it oughta solve the problem of mine
and that's a whole school of bullies shot up all at one time
Cause (I'mmmm) Shady, they call me as crazy
as the world was over this whole Y2K thing
And by the way, N'Sync, why do they sing?
Am I the only one who realizes they stink?
Should I dye my hair pink and care what y'all think?
Lip sync and buy a bigger size of earrings?
It's why I tend to block out when I hear things
Cause all these fans screamin is makin my ears ring (AHHHH!!!)
So I just, throw up a middle finger and let it linger
longer than the rumor that I was stickin it to Christina
Cause if I ever stuck it to any singer in showbiz
it'd be Jennifer Lopez, and Puffy you know this!
I'm sorry Puff, but I don't give a fuck if this chick was my own mother
I still fuck her with no rubber and cum inside her
and have a son and a new brother at the same time
and just say that it ain't mine, what's my name?
[Chorus]
[Eminem {vocal scratching}]
Guess who's b-back, back
Gue-gue-guess who's back (Hi mom!)
[scratch] Guess who's back
[scratch] Gue [scratch] guess who's back
D-12 [scratch] Guess who's back
Gue, gue-gue-gue, guess who's back
Dr. Dre [scratch] Guess who's back
Back back [scratch] back
[scratch]
Slim Shady, 2001
I'm blew out from this blunt (sighs) fuck
"The Kids"
[Mr. Mackey] [Eric Cartman]
And everyone should get along..
Okay children quiet down, quiet down
Children I'd like to introduce our new substitute teacher for the day
His name is Mr. Shady
Children quiet down please
Brian don't throw that (SHUT UP!)
Mr. Shady will be your new substitute
while Mr. Kaniff is out with pneumonia (HE'S GOT AIDS!)
Good luck Mr. Shady
[Eminem]
Hi there little boys and girls (FUCK YOU!)
Today we're gonna to learn how to poison squirrels
But first, I'd like you to meet my friend Bob (Huh?)
Say hi Bob! ("Hi Bob") Bob's 30 and still lives with his mom
and he don't got a job, cause Bob sits at home and smokes pot
but his twelve-year old brother looks up to him an awful lot
And Bob likes to hang out at the local waffle spot
and wait in the parkin lot for waitresses off the clock
when it's late and the lot gets dark and fake like he walks his dog
Drag 'em in the woods and go straight to the chopping blocks (AHH!)
And even if they escaped and they got the cops
the ladies would all be so afraid, they would drop the charge
'til one night Mrs. Stacey went off the job
when she felt someone grab her whole face and said not to talk
But Stacey knew it was Bob and said knock it off
But Bob wouldn't knock it off cause he's crazy and off his rocker
Crazier than Slim Shady is off the vodka
You couldn't even take him to Dre's to get Bob a "Dr."
He grabbed Stace' by the legs as chopped it off her
and dropped her off in the lake for the cops to find her
But ever since the day Stacey went off to wander
they never found her, and Bob still hangs at the waffle diner
And that's the story of Bob and his marijuana,
and what it might do to you
So see if the squirrels want any - it's bad for you
[Chorus: Mr. Mackey (Eminem)]
See children, drugs are bahhhd (c'mon)
and if you don't believe me, ask ya dahhhd (ask him man)
and if you don't believe him, ask ya mom (that's right)
She'll tell you how she does 'em all the time (she will)
So kids say no to drugs (that's right)
So you don't act like everyone else does (uh-huh)
Then there's really nothin else to say (sing along)
Drugs are just bad, mmm'kay?
[Eminem]
My penis is the size of a peanut, have you seen it?
FUCK NO you ain't seen it, it's the size of a peanut (Huh?)
Speakin of peanuts, you know what else is bad for squirrels?
Ecstasy is the worst drug in the world
If someone ever offers it to you, don't do it
Kids two hits'll probably drain all your spinal fluid
and spinal fluid is final, you won't get it back
So don't get attached, it'll attack every bone in your back
Meet Zach, twenty-one years old
After hangin out with some friends at a frat party, he gets bold
and decides to try five, when he's bribed by five guys
and peer pressure will win every time you try to fight it
Suddenly, he starts to convulse and his pulse goes into hyperdrive
and his eyes roll back in his skull {*blblblblblb*}
His back starts tah - look like the McDonald's Arches
He's on Donald's carpet, layin horizontal barfin {*BLEH*}
And everyone in the apartment starts laughin at him
"Hey Adam, Zach is a jackass, look at him!"
cause they took it too, so they think it's funny
So they're laughing at basically nothing except maybe wasting his money
Meanwhile, Zach's in a coma, the action is over
and his back and his shoulders hunched up like he's practicin yoga
And that's the story of Zach, the ecstasy maniac
So don't even feed that to squirrels class, cause it's bad for you
[Chorus: Mr. Mackey (Eminem)]
See children, drugs are bahhhd (that's right)
and if you don't believe me, ask ya dahhhd (that's right)
and if you don't believe him, ask ya mom (you can)
She'll tell you how she does 'em all the time (she will)
So kids say no to drugs (smoke crack)
So you don't act like everyone else does (that's right)
And there's really nothin else to say (but umm)
Drugs are just bad, mmm'kay?
[Eminem]
And last but not least, one of the most humungous
problems among young people today, is fungus
It grows from cow manure, they pick it out, wipe it off,
bag it up, and you put it right in your mouth and chew it
Yum yum! Then you start to see some dumb stuff
And everything slows down when you eat some of 'em..
And sometimes you see things that aren't there (Like what?)
Like fat woman in G-strings with orange hair
(Mr. Shady what's a G-string?) It's yarn Claire
Women stick 'em up their behinds, go out and wear 'em (Huh?)
And if you swallow too much of the magic mushrooms
Whoops, did I say magic mushrooms? I meant fungus
Ya tongue gets, all swoll up like a cow's tongue (How come?)
cause it comes from a cow's dung (Gross!!)
See drugs are bad, it's a common fact
But your mom and dad, know that's all that I'm good at (Oh!)
But don't be me, cause if you grow up and you go and O.D.
They're gonna come for me and I'ma have to grow a goatee
and get a disguise and hide, cause it'll be my fault
So don't do drugs, and do exactly as I don't,
cause I'm bad for you
[Chorus: Mr. Mackey (Eminem)]
See children, drugs are bahhhd (uh-huh)
and if you don't believe me, ask ya dahhhd (put that down)
and if you don't believe him, ask ya mom (you can ask)
She'll tell you how she does 'em all the time (and she will)
So kids say no to drugs (say no)
So you don't act like everyone else does (like I do)
And there's really nothin else to say (that's right)
Drugs are just bad, mmm'kay?
[Mr. Mackey] [Eric Cartman]
Come on children, clap along (SHUT UP!)
Sing along children (Suck my motherfuckin dick!)
Drugs are just bad, drugs are just bad (South Park is gonna sue me!)
So don't do drugs (Suck my motherfuckin penis!)
so there'll be more for me (Hippie! God damnit!)
(Mushrooms killed Kenny! *fart* Ewww, ahhh!)
(So, fucked up, right now..)
[Mr. Mackey] [Eric Cartman]
And everyone should get along..
Okay children quiet down, quiet down
Children I'd like to introduce our new substitute teacher for the day
His name is Mr. Shady
Children quiet down please
Brian don't throw that (SHUT UP!)
Mr. Shady will be your new substitute
while Mr. Kaniff is out with pneumonia (HE'S GOT AIDS!)
Good luck Mr. Shady
[Eminem]
Hi there little boys and girls (FUCK YOU!)
Today we're gonna to learn how to poison squirrels
But first, I'd like you to meet my friend Bob (Huh?)
Say hi Bob! ("Hi Bob") Bob's 30 and still lives with his mom
and he don't got a job, cause Bob sits at home and smokes pot
but his twelve-year old brother looks up to him an awful lot
And Bob likes to hang out at the local waffle spot
and wait in the parkin lot for waitresses off the clock
when it's late and the lot gets dark and fake like he walks his dog
Drag 'em in the woods and go straight to the chopping blocks (AHH!)
And even if they escaped and they got the cops
the ladies would all be so afraid, they would drop the charge
'til one night Mrs. Stacey went off the job
when she felt someone grab her whole face and said not to talk
But Stacey knew it was Bob and said knock it off
But Bob wouldn't knock it off cause he's crazy and off his rocker
Crazier than Slim Shady is off the vodka
You couldn't even take him to Dre's to get Bob a "Dr."
He grabbed Stace' by the legs as chopped it off her
and dropped her off in the lake for the cops to find her
But ever since the day Stacey went off to wander
they never found her, and Bob still hangs at the waffle diner
And that's the story of Bob and his marijuana,
and what it might do to you
So see if the squirrels want any - it's bad for you
[Chorus: Mr. Mackey (Eminem)]
See children, drugs are bahhhd (c'mon)
and if you don't believe me, ask ya dahhhd (ask him man)
and if you don't believe him, ask ya mom (that's right)
She'll tell you how she does 'em all the time (she will)
So kids say no to drugs (that's right)
So you don't act like everyone else does (uh-huh)
Then there's really nothin else to say (sing along)
Drugs are just bad, mmm'kay?
[Eminem]
My penis is the size of a peanut, have you seen it?
FUCK NO you ain't seen it, it's the size of a peanut (Huh?)
Speakin of peanuts, you know what else is bad for squirrels?
Ecstasy is the worst drug in the world
If someone ever offers it to you, don't do it
Kids two hits'll probably drain all your spinal fluid
and spinal fluid is final, you won't get it back
So don't get attached, it'll attack every bone in your back
Meet Zach, twenty-one years old
After hangin out with some friends at a frat party, he gets bold
and decides to try five, when he's bribed by five guys
and peer pressure will win every time you try to fight it
Suddenly, he starts to convulse and his pulse goes into hyperdrive
and his eyes roll back in his skull {*blblblblblb*}
His back starts tah - look like the McDonald's Arches
He's on Donald's carpet, layin horizontal barfin {*BLEH*}
And everyone in the apartment starts laughin at him
"Hey Adam, Zach is a jackass, look at him!"
cause they took it too, so they think it's funny
So they're laughing at basically nothing except maybe wasting his money
Meanwhile, Zach's in a coma, the action is over
and his back and his shoulders hunched up like he's practicin yoga
And that's the story of Zach, the ecstasy maniac
So don't even feed that to squirrels class, cause it's bad for you
[Chorus: Mr. Mackey (Eminem)]
See children, drugs are bahhhd (that's right)
and if you don't believe me, ask ya dahhhd (that's right)
and if you don't believe him, ask ya mom (you can)
She'll tell you how she does 'em all the time (she will)
So kids say no to drugs (smoke crack)
So you don't act like everyone else does (that's right)
And there's really nothin else to say (but umm)
Drugs are just bad, mmm'kay?
[Eminem]
And last but not least, one of the most humungous
problems among young people today, is fungus
It grows from cow manure, they pick it out, wipe it off,
bag it up, and you put it right in your mouth and chew it
Yum yum! Then you start to see some dumb stuff
And everything slows down when you eat some of 'em..
And sometimes you see things that aren't there (Like what?)
Like fat woman in G-strings with orange hair
(Mr. Shady what's a G-string?) It's yarn Claire
Women stick 'em up their behinds, go out and wear 'em (Huh?)
And if you swallow too much of the magic mushrooms
Whoops, did I say magic mushrooms? I meant fungus
Ya tongue gets, all swoll up like a cow's tongue (How come?)
cause it comes from a cow's dung (Gross!!)
See drugs are bad, it's a common fact
But your mom and dad, know that's all that I'm good at (Oh!)
But don't be me, cause if you grow up and you go and O.D.
They're gonna come for me and I'ma have to grow a goatee
and get a disguise and hide, cause it'll be my fault
So don't do drugs, and do exactly as I don't,
cause I'm bad for you
[Chorus: Mr. Mackey (Eminem)]
See children, drugs are bahhhd (uh-huh)
and if you don't believe me, ask ya dahhhd (put that down)
and if you don't believe him, ask ya mom (you can ask)
She'll tell you how she does 'em all the time (and she will)
So kids say no to drugs (say no)
So you don't act like everyone else does (like I do)
And there's really nothin else to say (that's right)
Drugs are just bad, mmm'kay?
[Mr. Mackey] [Eric Cartman]
Come on children, clap along (SHUT UP!)
Sing along children (Suck my motherfuckin dick!)
Drugs are just bad, drugs are just bad (South Park is gonna sue me!)
So don't do drugs (Suck my motherfuckin penis!)
so there'll be more for me (Hippie! God damnit!)
(Mushrooms killed Kenny! *fart* Ewww, ahhh!)
(So, fucked up, right now..)
"Criminal"
[Eminem]
A lot of people ask me.. stupid fucking questions
A lot of people think that.. what I say on records
or what I talk about on a record, that I actually do in real life
or that I believe in it
Or if I say that, I wanna kill somebody, that..
I'm actually gonna do it
or that I believe in it
Well, shit.. if you believe that
then I'll kill you
You know why?
Cause I'm a
CRIMINAL
CRIMINAL
You god damn right
I'm a CRIMINAL
Yeah, I'm a CRIMINAL
[Eminem]
My words are like a dagger with a jagged edge
That'll stab you in the head
whether you're a fag or lez
Or the homosex, hermaph or a trans-a-vest
Pants or dress - hate fags? The answer's "yes"
Homophobic? Nah, you're just heterophobic
Staring at my jeans, watching my genitals bulging (Ooh!)
That's my motherfucking balls, you'd better let go of em
They belong in my scrotum, you'll never get hold of em
Hey, it's me, Versace
Whoops, somebody shot me!
And I was just checking the mail
Get it? Checking the 'male'?
How many records you expecting to sell
after your second LP sends you directly to jail?
C'mon!-- Relax guy, I like gay men
Right, Ken? Give me an amen (AAA-men!)
Please Lord, this boy needs Jesus
Heal this child, help us destroy these demons
Oh, and please send me a brand new car
And a prostitute while my wife's sick in the hospital
Preacher preacher, fifth grade teacher
You can't reach me, my mom can't neither
You can't teach me a goddamn thing cause
I watch TV, and Comcast cable
and you ain't able to stop these thoughts
You can't stop me from topping these charts
And you can't stop me from dropping each March
with a brand new CD for these fucking retards
Duhhh, and to think, it's just little ol' me
Mr. "Don't Give A Fuck," still won't leave
[Chorus: Eminem (repeat 2X)]
I'm a CRIMINAL
Cause every time I write a rhyme, these people think it's a crime
to tell em what's on my mind - I guess I'm a CRIMINAL
but I don't gotta say a word, I just flip em the bird
and keep going, I don't take shit from no one
[Eminem]
My mother did drugs - hard-liquor, cigarettes, and speed
The baby came out - disfigured, ligaments indeed
It was a seed who would grow up just as crazy as she
Don't dare make fun of that baby cause that baby was me
I'm a CRIMINAL - an animal caged who turned crazed
But how the fuck you supposed to grow up when you weren't raised?
So as I got older and I got a lot taller
My dick shrunk smaller, but my balls got larger
I drink more liquor to fuck you up quicker
than you'd wanna fuck me up for saying the word ...
My morals went thhbbpp when the president got oral
Sex in his Oval Office on top of his desk
Off of his own employee
Now don't ignore me, you won't avoid me
You can't miss me, I'm white, blonde-haired
and my nose is pointy
I'm the bad guy who makes fun of people that die
in plane crashes and laughs
As long as it ain't happened to him
Slim Shady, I'm as crazy as Em
-inem and Kim combined - [*kch*] the maniac's in
Replacing the doctor cause Dre couldn't make it today
He's a little under the weather, so I'm taking his place
(Mm-mm-mmm!) Oh, that's Dre with an AK to his face
Don't make me kill him too and spray his brains all over the place
I told you Dre, you should've kept that thang put away
I guess that'll teach you not to let me play with it, eh?
I'm a CRIMINAL
[Interlude Skit]
Aight look (uh huh) just go up in that motherfucker
get the motherfucking money and get the fuck up outta there
[Em] Aight
I'll be right here waiting on you
[Em] Aight
Yo Em
[Em] What?!
Don't kill nobody this time
[Em] Awwright... god damn, fuck...
(whistling) how you doin'?
[Teller] HI, how can I help you?
[Eminem] Yeah I need to make a withdrawl
[Teller] Okay
[Eminem] Put the fucking money in the bag bitch
and I won't kill you!
[Teller] What? Oh my god, don't kill me
[Eminem] I'm not gonna kill you bitch, quit looking around...
[Teller] Don't kill me, please don't kill me...
[Eminem] I said I'm not gonna fucking kill you
Hurry the fuck up! [*BOOM*] Thank you!
[Eminem]
Windows tinted on my ride when I drive in it
So when I rob a bank, run out and just dive in it
So I'll be disguised in it
And if anybody identifies the guy in it
I'll hide for five minutes
Come back, shoot the eyewitness
Fire at the private eye hired to pry in my business
Die, bitches, bastards, brats, pets
This puppy's lucky I didn't blast his ass yet [*dog whines*]
If I ever gave a fuck, I'd shave my nuts
tuck my dick in between my legs and cluck
You motherfucking chickens ain't brave enough
to say the stuff I say, so just tape it shut [*tape unrolls*]
Shit, half the shit I say, I just make it up
To make you mad so kiss my white naked ass
And if it's not a rapper that I make it as
I'ma be a fucking rapist in a Jason mask
[Chorus 2X]
[Eminem]
A lot of people ask me.. stupid fucking questions
A lot of people think that.. what I say on records
or what I talk about on a record, that I actually do in real life
or that I believe in it
Or if I say that, I wanna kill somebody, that..
I'm actually gonna do it
or that I believe in it
Well, shit.. if you believe that
then I'll kill you
You know why?
Cause I'm a
CRIMINAL
CRIMINAL
You god damn right
I'm a CRIMINAL
Yeah, I'm a CRIMINAL
[Eminem]
My words are like a dagger with a jagged edge
That'll stab you in the head
whether you're a fag or lez
Or the homosex, hermaph or a trans-a-vest
Pants or dress - hate fags? The answer's "yes"
Homophobic? Nah, you're just heterophobic
Staring at my jeans, watching my genitals bulging (Ooh!)
That's my motherfucking balls, you'd better let go of em
They belong in my scrotum, you'll never get hold of em
Hey, it's me, Versace
Whoops, somebody shot me!
And I was just checking the mail
Get it? Checking the 'male'?
How many records you expecting to sell
after your second LP sends you directly to jail?
C'mon!-- Relax guy, I like gay men
Right, Ken? Give me an amen (AAA-men!)
Please Lord, this boy needs Jesus
Heal this child, help us destroy these demons
Oh, and please send me a brand new car
And a prostitute while my wife's sick in the hospital
Preacher preacher, fifth grade teacher
You can't reach me, my mom can't neither
You can't teach me a goddamn thing cause
I watch TV, and Comcast cable
and you ain't able to stop these thoughts
You can't stop me from topping these charts
And you can't stop me from dropping each March
with a brand new CD for these fucking retards
Duhhh, and to think, it's just little ol' me
Mr. "Don't Give A Fuck," still won't leave
[Chorus: Eminem (repeat 2X)]
I'm a CRIMINAL
Cause every time I write a rhyme, these people think it's a crime
to tell em what's on my mind - I guess I'm a CRIMINAL
but I don't gotta say a word, I just flip em the bird
and keep going, I don't take shit from no one
[Eminem]
My mother did drugs - hard-liquor, cigarettes, and speed
The baby came out - disfigured, ligaments indeed
It was a seed who would grow up just as crazy as she
Don't dare make fun of that baby cause that baby was me
I'm a CRIMINAL - an animal caged who turned crazed
But how the fuck you supposed to grow up when you weren't raised?
So as I got older and I got a lot taller
My dick shrunk smaller, but my balls got larger
I drink more liquor to fuck you up quicker
than you'd wanna fuck me up for saying the word ...
My morals went thhbbpp when the president got oral
Sex in his Oval Office on top of his desk
Off of his own employee
Now don't ignore me, you won't avoid me
You can't miss me, I'm white, blonde-haired
and my nose is pointy
I'm the bad guy who makes fun of people that die
in plane crashes and laughs
As long as it ain't happened to him
Slim Shady, I'm as crazy as Em
-inem and Kim combined - [*kch*] the maniac's in
Replacing the doctor cause Dre couldn't make it today
He's a little under the weather, so I'm taking his place
(Mm-mm-mmm!) Oh, that's Dre with an AK to his face
Don't make me kill him too and spray his brains all over the place
I told you Dre, you should've kept that thang put away
I guess that'll teach you not to let me play with it, eh?
I'm a CRIMINAL
[Interlude Skit]
Aight look (uh huh) just go up in that motherfucker
get the motherfucking money and get the fuck up outta there
[Em] Aight
I'll be right here waiting on you
[Em] Aight
Yo Em
[Em] What?!
Don't kill nobody this time
[Em] Awwright... god damn, fuck...
(whistling) how you doin'?
[Teller] HI, how can I help you?
[Eminem] Yeah I need to make a withdrawl
[Teller] Okay
[Eminem] Put the fucking money in the bag bitch
and I won't kill you!
[Teller] What? Oh my god, don't kill me
[Eminem] I'm not gonna kill you bitch, quit looking around...
[Teller] Don't kill me, please don't kill me...
[Eminem] I said I'm not gonna fucking kill you
Hurry the fuck up! [*BOOM*] Thank you!
[Eminem]
Windows tinted on my ride when I drive in it
So when I rob a bank, run out and just dive in it
So I'll be disguised in it
And if anybody identifies the guy in it
I'll hide for five minutes
Come back, shoot the eyewitness
Fire at the private eye hired to pry in my business
Die, bitches, bastards, brats, pets
This puppy's lucky I didn't blast his ass yet [*dog whines*]
If I ever gave a fuck, I'd shave my nuts
tuck my dick in between my legs and cluck
You motherfucking chickens ain't brave enough
to say the stuff I say, so just tape it shut [*tape unrolls*]
Shit, half the shit I say, I just make it up
To make you mad so kiss my white naked ass
And if it's not a rapper that I make it as
I'ma be a fucking rapist in a Jason mask
[Chorus 2X]
"Under The Influence"
(feat. D-12)
[Eminem]
Translation
So you can suck my dick if you don't like, my shit
Cause I was high when I wrote this so suck, my dick - ha ha!
Two pills I pop, 'til my pupils swell up like two pennies
I'm Clint Eastwood in his mid-twenties
A young ass man with a trash can strapped to the back of his ass
so the rats can't chew through his last pants
I'm like a mummy at night, fightin with bright lightning
Frightened with five little white Vicadin pills bitin him
I'm like a fuckin wasp in the hospital lost
Stingin the fuck outta everything I come across in the halls
I light a candle and place it up on the mantle
Grab a knife at the blade and stab you with the fuckin handle
So when you find yourself wrapped up in the blinds, hurtin
[Swifty] Bitch it's too late
[Eminem] Cause once you're hung from the drapes, it's curtains
[Swifty]
I'm an instigator, .380 slug penetrator
Degradin, creatin murders to kill haters
Accused for every crime known through the equator
They knew I did it (uh-huh) for havin blood on my 'gators
My weed'll hit yo' chest like a double barrel gauge an'
I'm a black grenade that'll blow up in yo' face [*BLAM*]
With a fifth in me, when I guzzle Remi I do shit on purpose
You never hear me say, "Forgive me"
I'm snatchin every penny - it gotta be that way nigga, face it
That weed I sold to you, Brigade laced it
You hidin, I make the president get a facelift
Niggaz just afraid, handin me they bracelets
Chillin in the lab wasted
I'm the type that'll drink Kahlua and gin - throw up on the mic
Your life is ruined, you get socked right on site
And even at the Million Man March, we gon' fight
[Chorus: Eminem]
So you can suck my dick if you don't like, my shit
Cause I was high when I wrote this so suck, my dick
Cause I don't give a fuck if you don't like, my shit
Cause I was high when I wrote this so suck, my dick
[Bizarre]
I'm a compulsive liar, settin my preacher on fire
Slashin your tires, flyin down Fenkel and Meyers
Plates expired, soon as I'm hired, I'm fired
Jackin my dick off in a bed of barbed wire
(Hey, is Bizarre performing?) Bitch didn't you read the flyer?
Special invited guest will be, Richard Pryor
(Aren't you a male dancer?) Nah bitch, I'm retired
Fuckin your bitch in the ass with a tire iron
I'm ripped, I'm on an acid trip
My DJ's in a coma for lettin the record skip.. [needle pops]
Lettin the record skip.. [needle pops]
Lettin the record skip.. [needle pops] (Damn!)
[DJ reverses the record and scratches it back on beat]
I'm fuckin anything when I'm snortin
It's gonna cost 300 dollars to get my pit bull an abortion
[dog whines] Some bitch asked for my autograph
I called her a whore, spit beer in her face and laughed
I drop bombs like I was in Vietnam
All bitches is hoes, even my stinkin ass mom
[Proof]
Aiyyo flashback, two feets, two deep up in that ass crack
Weed laced with somethin [*gun cocks*] nigga pass that
In Amsterdam we only hang out with hash rats
At a 'Stop the Violence' rally, I blast gats
Be your mom on publishin, get your ASCAP-ped
The Kuniva, divide up your cash stack
Run your motherfuckin pockets, ASAP
I don't need a platinum chain, bitch I snatch Shaq's
Born loser, half theif and half black
Bring your boys and your guns and get laughed at
Bitch smacker, rich rappers get they Jag jacked
and found chopped up in a trash bag
[Kuniva]
We stranglin rappers until the point they can't yell
cause they crew is full of fags and sweeter than bake sales
Reckless, come from behind and snatch your necklace
Gruesome, and causin more violence than nine hoodlums
I grapple your adam's apple until it crackle
Run right past you, turn around, grab you and stab you
Get executed, cuz I'm a "Luni"
I got a "Yukmouth" and it's polluted
I cock it back then shoot it
I love snatchin up players thugs and young ballers
Shoot up the household, even the young toddlers
Brigade barricade to bring the noise
While the bullets break your bones up like Christmas toys
If I go solo, I'm doin a song with Bolo
A big Chinese nigga, screamin "Kuniva yo yo.."
I leave ya face leakin, run up in church
and smack the preacher while he's preachin
Take a swing at the deacon
[Kon Artis]
I used to tell cats I sold weed and weight
I was straight 'til I got caught sellin em shake
I'm ignorant, with the intent to snatch your rent
I got kicked out of summer camp for havin sex in my tent
with the superintendent's daughter, my brain's out of order
I've been a Kon Artis since I was swimmin in water
In cahoots with this nigga named Carlisle Von
who got fired from UPS for tryin to send you a bomb
(Special delivery!) I signed to a local label for fun
Say I got cancer, get dropped, take the advancement and run
Driveby you in the rain while you carry your son
Call your house and hang up on you for not givin me none
Born straight up out a pussy but a son of a gun
Got a reputation for havin niggaz runnin they funds
Used to be the type of nigga that was foldin some one's
'til I met your fat mama, now I'm rollin in dough
[Chorus]
[Eminem]
Haha.. suck my motherfuckin dick
D-12.. Dirty motherfuckin Dozen
Nasty like a stank slut bitch with thirty fuckin husbands
Bizarre kid
Swifty McVeigh
The Kon Artis
The Kuniva
Dirty Harry
Haha, and Slim Shady..
(feat. D-12)
[Eminem]
Translation
So you can suck my dick if you don't like, my shit
Cause I was high when I wrote this so suck, my dick - ha ha!
Two pills I pop, 'til my pupils swell up like two pennies
I'm Clint Eastwood in his mid-twenties
A young ass man with a trash can strapped to the back of his ass
so the rats can't chew through his last pants
I'm like a mummy at night, fightin with bright lightning
Frightened with five little white Vicadin pills bitin him
I'm like a fuckin wasp in the hospital lost
Stingin the fuck outta everything I come across in the halls
I light a candle and place it up on the mantle
Grab a knife at the blade and stab you with the fuckin handle
So when you find yourself wrapped up in the blinds, hurtin
[Swifty] Bitch it's too late
[Eminem] Cause once you're hung from the drapes, it's curtains
[Swifty]
I'm an instigator, .380 slug penetrator
Degradin, creatin murders to kill haters
Accused for every crime known through the equator
They knew I did it (uh-huh) for havin blood on my 'gators
My weed'll hit yo' chest like a double barrel gauge an'
I'm a black grenade that'll blow up in yo' face [*BLAM*]
With a fifth in me, when I guzzle Remi I do shit on purpose
You never hear me say, "Forgive me"
I'm snatchin every penny - it gotta be that way nigga, face it
That weed I sold to you, Brigade laced it
You hidin, I make the president get a facelift
Niggaz just afraid, handin me they bracelets
Chillin in the lab wasted
I'm the type that'll drink Kahlua and gin - throw up on the mic
Your life is ruined, you get socked right on site
And even at the Million Man March, we gon' fight
[Chorus: Eminem]
So you can suck my dick if you don't like, my shit
Cause I was high when I wrote this so suck, my dick
Cause I don't give a fuck if you don't like, my shit
Cause I was high when I wrote this so suck, my dick
[Bizarre]
I'm a compulsive liar, settin my preacher on fire
Slashin your tires, flyin down Fenkel and Meyers
Plates expired, soon as I'm hired, I'm fired
Jackin my dick off in a bed of barbed wire
(Hey, is Bizarre performing?) Bitch didn't you read the flyer?
Special invited guest will be, Richard Pryor
(Aren't you a male dancer?) Nah bitch, I'm retired
Fuckin your bitch in the ass with a tire iron
I'm ripped, I'm on an acid trip
My DJ's in a coma for lettin the record skip.. [needle pops]
Lettin the record skip.. [needle pops]
Lettin the record skip.. [needle pops] (Damn!)
[DJ reverses the record and scratches it back on beat]
I'm fuckin anything when I'm snortin
It's gonna cost 300 dollars to get my pit bull an abortion
[dog whines] Some bitch asked for my autograph
I called her a whore, spit beer in her face and laughed
I drop bombs like I was in Vietnam
All bitches is hoes, even my stinkin ass mom
[Proof]
Aiyyo flashback, two feets, two deep up in that ass crack
Weed laced with somethin [*gun cocks*] nigga pass that
In Amsterdam we only hang out with hash rats
At a 'Stop the Violence' rally, I blast gats
Be your mom on publishin, get your ASCAP-ped
The Kuniva, divide up your cash stack
Run your motherfuckin pockets, ASAP
I don't need a platinum chain, bitch I snatch Shaq's
Born loser, half theif and half black
Bring your boys and your guns and get laughed at
Bitch smacker, rich rappers get they Jag jacked
and found chopped up in a trash bag
[Kuniva]
We stranglin rappers until the point they can't yell
cause they crew is full of fags and sweeter than bake sales
Reckless, come from behind and snatch your necklace
Gruesome, and causin more violence than nine hoodlums
I grapple your adam's apple until it crackle
Run right past you, turn around, grab you and stab you
Get executed, cuz I'm a "Luni"
I got a "Yukmouth" and it's polluted
I cock it back then shoot it
I love snatchin up players thugs and young ballers
Shoot up the household, even the young toddlers
Brigade barricade to bring the noise
While the bullets break your bones up like Christmas toys
If I go solo, I'm doin a song with Bolo
A big Chinese nigga, screamin "Kuniva yo yo.."
I leave ya face leakin, run up in church
and smack the preacher while he's preachin
Take a swing at the deacon
[Kon Artis]
I used to tell cats I sold weed and weight
I was straight 'til I got caught sellin em shake
I'm ignorant, with the intent to snatch your rent
I got kicked out of summer camp for havin sex in my tent
with the superintendent's daughter, my brain's out of order
I've been a Kon Artis since I was swimmin in water
In cahoots with this nigga named Carlisle Von
who got fired from UPS for tryin to send you a bomb
(Special delivery!) I signed to a local label for fun
Say I got cancer, get dropped, take the advancement and run
Driveby you in the rain while you carry your son
Call your house and hang up on you for not givin me none
Born straight up out a pussy but a son of a gun
Got a reputation for havin niggaz runnin they funds
Used to be the type of nigga that was foldin some one's
'til I met your fat mama, now I'm rollin in dough
[Chorus]
[Eminem]
Haha.. suck my motherfuckin dick
D-12.. Dirty motherfuckin Dozen
Nasty like a stank slut bitch with thirty fuckin husbands
Bizarre kid
Swifty McVeigh
The Kon Artis
The Kuniva
Dirty Harry
Haha, and Slim Shady..
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